Pardoner and Host

I think our host might just as well begin,
For he is most-enveloped in all sin.
Come forth, sir host, and offer first anon,
And you shall kiss the relics, every one,
Aye, for a groat! Unbuckle now your purse.”
“Nay, nay,” said he, “then may I have Christ’s curse!
It sha’n’t be,” said he, “as I’ve hope for riches,
Why, you would have me kissing your old breeches,
And swear they were the relics of a saint,
Though with your excrement ’twere dabbed like paint.
By cross Saint Helen found in Holy Land,
I would I had your ballocks in my hand
Instead of relics in a reliquary;
Let’s cut them off, and them I’ll help you carry;
They shall be shrined within a hog’s fat turd.”


‘Now sirs,’ quoth this Oswald the Reeve,

I pray you all that none of you may grieve

Though I replied, mocking him just now;

For lawful is it force to force should bow.

The drunken Miller has told us here

Of this beguiling of the carpenter,

Perhaps in scorn because I too am one.

And by your leave I’ll him repay anon,

In his own boorish language, no mistake.

And I pray to God his neck might break!

He sees a mote in my eye, or a stalk,

But no beam in his own, for all his talk.’

Vocab 6

Parsimonious – adj. stingy
Penchant – n. a strong taste or liking for something
Penitent – adj. sorry, contrite
Pervade – v. to spread throughout
Portent – n. an omen; a sign of something coming in the future
Prodigal – adj. wastefully extravagant
Propensity – n. a natural inclination or tendency
Prosaic – adj. dull; unimaginative; everyday; ordinary; more literally, having to do with prose rather than poetry
Querulous – adj. complaining; grumbling; whining
Rancor – n. a bitter, long-lasting ill-will or resentment